"Hey Giacomo. Ya ever seen these court programs? They are hilarious. Ya got the poor saps tryin' to speak for themselves and they sound like they went into the courthouse drunk." Uncle Sal looked at his Purple People Eater watch and said, "The one comes on next is my favorite. There's this lawyer on the program reminds me of a guy I knew in law school, name of Guy Winkley."
Giacomo went to the bar and began to prepare his own mai tai by dropping a slice of pineapple into his glass.
"This guy Winkley, he was some kinda brown-nose, especially in the courses taught by Tate Geschlicten. Winkley, he had a comment on every issue that professor brought up. And he made it clear to everyone in the class that he had read every last one of Geschlicten's books, briefs, and prolly pamphlets." After a sip of his mai tai, Uncle Sal continued. "Course that was just a good start for Winkley. See, this professor, he thought lawyerin' began and ended with Clarence Darrow. He was forever preaching the gospel of Clarence. I'll tell ya, it didn't take long for Winkley to glom onto that. Soon, he was framing all his comments in light of what the professor and ol' Clarence said. Like he didn't have an original thought in that coconut of his. Funny thing, everyone thinks lawyers is so smart and well-spoken. Maybe that's true, but Winkley found that what you say is just as important to your success."
"It sure sounds like he had law school all figured out."
"I'll say he did. I don't know what kinda lawyer he became, but he made it through law school by talkin the Tate and Darrow."
This episode featured:
Jarvis "Felonious" Monk as Uncle Sal
Aiden Abet as Giacomo
Jellybean Merengue as the slice of pineapple.
Tune in next week when Uncle Sal says, "Awful good cereal flakes, Miss Mcdonough."