Sunday, January 25, 2009

Uncle Sal and the Unpredictable Uniform (Episode 77)

Uncle Sal removed the tortoiseshell glasses from the front of his Buffalo Braves Bob McAdoo jersey and looked at Alice's photos of her visit to Kazakhstan. "What's with all the heads cut off in these photos?"

"Oh, that's my girlfriend Ursula. She always manages to do that. Funny thing is, it's hard to keep the camera out of her hands. We try to keep her from taking photos, but she'll grab it out of someone's hand and tell us to pose so she can take the shot. You can see the results."

"Reminds me of a guy I knew in the police department, Alvis Streep. He was the son of the captain. I think that's the only reason he got the job."

Uncle Sal reached for a chocolate in the dish on the table, removed the foil and popped it into his mouth.

"Well, even the cap'n knew better than to put Alvis on the street. Guy mighta passed all his tests to make the force, or maybe he didn't, but cap'n put him in a position where he could do the least amount of harm. So he put Alvis in charge of fingerprints and mugshots. The fingerprints he did pretty well with. The mugshots were another story. He'd always find a way to get at least one mugshot where the suspect was out of the frame. It was amazing. Alvis'd cough or sneeze, or sump'n just as he was about to take the shot. Those suspects, as if they didn't have enough to worry about, they usually had to get six mugshots taken before Alvis got it completely right. It got to be a prime source of entertainment at the station. We got to where we'd watch and see how he'd goof it up. Or sometimes, we helped it along by calling his name right as he was about to take the photo. Boy, we sure had a lotta laughs watchin' Streep blunder the mug.

This epsiode featured
Frank Furter as Uncle Sal
Pearl Barley as Alice
Jellybean Merengue as the foil.

Tune in next week when Uncle Sal says, "Only one man would dare give me the raspberry."

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