Sunday, December 21, 2008

Uncle Sal and the Inebriated Interloper (Episode 72)

Uncle Sal sat across from Giacomo at the Root Hog or Diner reading the newspaper. Giacomo looked at his uncle. "Isn't it a little cold to be wearing just a basketball jersey?"

"Don't tell me yer gettin' soft on me. It ain't that cold. Besides, how are ya gonna cover up an Atlanta Hawks Jon Koncak jersey with a jacket? Hey, ya know what I saw on the way over here? A Vole. Prolly the last one on the road."

"What's a Vole?"

"It's a car made by Itchibelli Motors. Mostly a failed experiment, kind of like the Edsel. I'm surprised there was still one on the road. Those things didn't run worth a hoot. Anyway, I had a friend, Eustace Pistachio, had a Vole, a brown one. The engine started smoking as he drove it home from the lot. He had nothing but trouble with that car, but he always thought he could fix it. Well, one day, he's getting ready for work..."

The waitress arrived with their food and Uncle Sal immediately doused his potatoes with hot sauce. "One day, he's getting ready for work, and he sees the passenger door of his car open. But that ain't even the weirdest part. Passed out in the passenger seat is a woman, naked as the day she was born. Her clothes are lyin' on the curb. He don't want to touch 'em, but figgers it's the only way he's gonna know who this woman is that's sittin' in his car. He picked up her short shorts and found her driver's license. Woman's name was Megan Crumpleton."

Giacomo rubbed his tired eyes, took a sip of his coffee and said, "Wait a minute. Wait a minute. I think I missed something."

"What's to miss? All I was sayin' was that Eustace found a bare Meg in a brown Vole."

This episode featured:
Ted Oosterhaus as Uncle Sal
Vinnie Victorino as Giacomo
Jellybean Merengue as the hot sauce.

Tune in next week when Uncle Sal says, "I used to have that problem. Now I just think about baseball."

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