Sunday, December 14, 2008

Uncle Sal and the Muddled Manuscript (Episode 71)

Uncle Sal entered John's place for the weekly pinochle game and went immediately to the fridge. He moved aside a turnip and took a cold Spud's beer for himself. As he moved toward the table, Joe said, "I didn't know you were a St. Louis Cardinals fan. And who's number eleven?"

"Who's number eleven? It's Jose Oquendo. First guy to play all nine positions in a single season."

Where ya been, Sal? You been real hard to get a hold of these last few weeks."

Uncle Sal popped a pistachio into his mouth and said, "I been workin' on a novel."

"You've been working on a novel?"

"It ain't so hard to believe, is it?"

"So what's it about?" Joe asked as he dealt the cards.

"Well, it's about Sasquatch. In my book, he's a private dick. I guess you could say it's a fairly typical private dick novel. There's a beautiful but dangerous broad, and alla that stuff. Just imagine if Philip Marlowe were really hairy. Only thing is, I kinda got bogged down by it. I mean, I started out with Sasquatch, a beautiful dame, a crime. But before I knew it, I had a whole mess of characters I didn't know what to do with. Professional wrestlers, shifty doctors, even a ballplayer. So, to be honest, I was kinda stuck. I had no idea what to do."

Sal sipped from his bottle of Spud's. "Then I started throwing a whole buncha stuff away. Just gettin' rid all kinda things in the story. Long story short, now I'm working on a new novel where Sasquatch is a professional wrestler."

"Sasquatch as a wrestler? Well, I wouldn't want to take him on, that's for sure. How's the new story coming along?"

"So far, so good. I just think I needed to move on from that quagmire I was working on before. Just goes to show you a botched plot never spoils."

This episode featured:
Fred Fizzlewick as Uncle Sal
Norberto "Nobby" Doerr as Joe
Jellybean Merengue as the turnip.

Tune in next week when Uncle Sal says, "A woman will lie about anything, just to stay in practice."

No comments: