Sunday, June 7, 2009

Uncle Sal and the Poor Poet (Episode 96)

Giacomo sat down on Uncle Sal's couch and picked up the Scotch and soda Uncle Sal had placed on the Pecos Bill coaster. Uncle Sal said, "So are you ready for the school bus demolition derby?"

Before Giacomo could answer, his phone rang. He looked at the number displayed and rolled his eyes. "Hey Steve. Look, I can't talk right now. Yeah, I'll give you a call when I can."

Uncle Sal felt the pocket of his Brotherhood of Oyster Merchants bowling shirt and pulled out a five dollar bill. As he slid the bill into his wallet, he asked "What was that all about?"

"That was Steve McCool. You remember him, right? They came to visit me one time and he and his girlfriend Lucretia did nothing but sit and watch TV. Well, now he's got a new girlfriend named Dee. And he's writing poems about her."

"Nothing wrong with that."

"Not on the face of it. I mean, it's a really thoughtful thing to do. But these poems are terrible. He's written odes, haiku, and I think he is working on a sonnet. The thing is, he's always calling me to run these poems by me. And he asks for my input. The other day, he asked me if I could come up with a word that rhymes with hazel. The only one I could really think of was basil. So he ended up saying that her eyes are like an herb."

Giacomo sipped his drink and said, "I don't know what to do. I don't want to have any part of these awful poems, but he keeps calling me and he's been such a good friend for such a long time."

Uncle Sal took a sip of his Scotch and said, "Sounds to me like there's not a lot you can do. I mean you can stop taking his phone calls but it sounds like he'll find some way to get these poems to you cuz he's really got a Dee in his sonnet. "

This episode featured:
Percy Plisskin as Giacomo
Byron Beaverton as Uncle Sal
Jellybean Merengue as the Pecos Bill coaster.

Tune in next week when Uncle Sal says, "Someone oughta sell tickets."

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