Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Ask Uncle Sal: Bowling shoes, spanakopita, and other horrors

Dear Uncle Sal, which is better: to own your own pair of bowling shoes or merely rent them? Gutterballed

This here's an easy one, Gutterballed. I ain't rented a pair of bowling shoes in decades. Fer one, ya don't have to worry about the fungus everyone else had in those rented shoes before you got to put 'em on. And let's not forget that yer payin' for the privilege of wearin' them old bowling shoes every time ya roll.
On the other hand, if ya buy a pair of bowling shoes, ya can get them with sweet flame designs on the side if ya want. It beats them plain red, white, and blue ones they have at every bowling alley. Besides, if ya got yer own pair of shoes, that means ya got money for one more round of Spud's because you didn't spend any money on some nasty rented shoes. If that ain't a reason to buy yer own pair, I dunno what is.

Dear Uncle Sal, a friend of mine went to a Greek restaurant and got spanakopita. Can she infect me when we get together in the you know, bood-wah? Petrified in Paragonah

Boy, folks sure gotta different definition of friend than I ever had. I never ended up in the boudoir (nice spellin' by the way, PiP) with a lady that was just a friend. But to answer yer question, what exactly are ya afraid you'll be infected with? Iron? Vitamin B6? Dietary fiber? I reckon you'll be just fine in the boudoir...unless of course she has some communicable disease.

Gotta question for Uncle Sal? Submit it at the Facebook fan page or send it to my gmail.

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