Saturday, October 9, 2010

Uncle Sal and the Malcontent Mother (Episode 164)

Uncle Sal walked into Giacomo's place and was quickly introduced to Giacomo's new girlfriend Amelia and her mother, Violet. Amelia wore some tight velvet pants and a crimson crop top so small it looked like it had been purchased in the junior department. Uncle Sal volunteered to help Giacomo make some drinks.

"I would like a very dry martini. You know how to make one of those, don't you? Not an apple martini, not a lemon martini, just a very dry gin martini," Amelia's mother Violet called to them.

Behind the bar, he said, "Geez, Giacomo! You've been going out with this girl for what, a week? Kinda early to be meetin' the mother ain't it?" As he opened the bottle of vermouth, a drop spilled onto his plaid Mighty Mighty Bosstones jacket and he quickly wiped it off.

"Trust me, it wasn't my idea. Amelia is a photographer and she took some shots for this guy Enzo Grappa." Before Giacomo could continue his story, Violet interrupted, "And put three olives in my martini. You do have olives, right? Well, three is the perfect amount. No more, no less."

As Giacomo and Uncle Sal mixed the drinks, Violet stepped around Giacomo's bronze tortoise statue and wandered over to Giacomo's bookcase, inspecting the spines for titles that would confirm he was not good enough for her daughter. With her back to everyone else in the room, she called, "I hope we're not going to that Eye-talian place for dinner. Their breadsticks always taste stale. And Amelia, I hope you told them I can't go to the Indian place. The spice doesn't agree with me."

Giacomo said, "So Enzo entered this raffle at the last Grackles meeting. He only bought one ticket but he won a thousand bucks. You believe that? So, to thank Amelia for the photos, he's taking us to La Grenouille Bleue."

Violet had been so intent on studying the books that she hadn't heard Giacomo or noticed that he standing behind her with the dry martini. "So where are we going to eat tonight? I do love martinis, but a woman cannot live on gin and olives alone."

Uncle Sal cleared his throat and said, "Ain'tcha been listenin'? Giacomo just said that we're going to La Grenouille Bleue because Grappa's got a grand, you hag."

This episode featured:
R. James Brownville as Uncle Sal
Dae Ho "Maceo" Park as Giacomo
Olivia Soul as Amelia
Eunice Hurlburtt as Violet
Jellybean Merengue as the bronze tortoise statue.

Tune in next week when Uncle Sal says, "So I'm not sick? Except for this terminal disease?"

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