Uncle Sal put his purple bowler hat on the seat next to him in the booth. As he reached for a menu, he took a good look at Giacomo.
"Whassamatter, Giacomo? You look a little frazzled."
"I don't doubt it." The waitress delivered Giacomo's coffee and he tipped a couple drops of hot sauce into it. "I was just over at Earl Morse's. He just bought a new flat screen TV and digital video recorder and asked me to help him move the stuff into his apartment. Well, we get the TV up the stairs and into his place, that TV is pretty heavy by the way, then he wants me to help him hook it up."
Giacomo sipped his coffee and continued. "This guy Earl is about as sharp as a sack of wet mice. Couldn't figure out how to hook up the video recorder to his expensive new TV. I mean, it's hard to believe the guy's an engineer. Sometimes, he doesn't seem smart enough to roll out of bed."
Uncle Sal nodded and said he knew some folks like that.
"So, I get the whole thing hooked up, and I'm ready to come here to meet you. He asks me if I can help him find Welcome Back Kotter. It's his favorite show. He's a big Travolta fan and he wants to set the video recorder to record every episode. I show him step-by-step how to find and record shows. Then you know what he does? He gives me this blank stare and asks me if I can also set it to record every episode of Alice. You believe this guy?"
"Yeah, I believe it. From what you're tellin' me, you can lead a Morse to Kotter, but you can't make him think."
This episode featured:
Don Bong as Uncle Sal
Fletcher Andradez as Giacomo
Jellybean Merengue as the bottle of hot sauce
Tune in next week when Uncle Sal says, "No, it ain't in my repertoire."
[12 February 2008]